Saturday, August 19, 2017

Thou bittersweet, O motherhood!

Journey of a mother as her daughter turns four ...

A motherhood is 

...a day old clothing
uncombed hair 
before you could blink shower 
pyjamas with smeared hand prints all over
dishes filled sink
a grubby house 
unmade beds 
ever growing laundry
the art of cleaning the same place many times a day and still failing bruised knees 
a tycoon hit looking living room after you return from work 
3 AM wake ups and 1 PM bedtimes when your child is sick 
being on-call 24/7 – no pay and no day-offs 
going from ‘Yuck!’ to ‘Here, wipe it on my shirt'
drinking reheated tea at least 5 times 
reading “The Alchemist” till eternity because every time you pick the book, the apple of your eye decides to poo 
tidying, feeding, talking and answering 
All at the same time.


but...being a mommy   
is about joyful hearts.
is about magical kisses.
is having the entire world in your hands when those tiny hands hold you tight.
is a sink full of dishes but a house filled of laughter
is draining but exhilarating.
is the hardest and the happiest hood ever.
Being mother soothes.
It is about doing it again and again…gleefully!

Picture Credit : Scribbles by Radhika (My mother is in shape!) :D

Friday, May 12, 2017

Make up

Dear therapist,

Thank you for your discernment and for giving free insights every time. For that each time when you say that relying on makeup indiscreetly talks about withered self-esteem and insecurities. Every time, when you recommended me to go out without wearing makeup for a day and see how it feels.

Well, I think it is time to have a look at your prescription all over again.

Makeup. I love using it and I use it just because I love using it, in spite of the fact, that though, as a society we have come a long way in terms of opening up of our mindset and also makeup has been around for ages, painted faces are still judged for using it. I cannot deny, the act of using make up can be cost prohibitive and can fan our sense of vanity. That, make up, can be a luxury, often made to procure by persistent marketing strategies, played by ruthless advertisements.

However, in today's scenario, which talks about women independence and indulgence she should get in unabashedly, I think using make up can speak a lot about her affluence (her prerogative to pamper herself).

So, if we go under the skin on such issues , there are many underlying nuances that come to the fore.

Well, leaving it on that note, as I start penning down... these are some often heard musings, some times overheard.

"Skin damage nahin hoti, roz make up karne se."
"Itna time mil jata hai subah subah?, followed by their pious ‘I don’t get time for these things!’
"Natural looks ki baat hi kuch aur hoti hai!"
"You look pretty without make up", well that's my father, usually. :)
And, lately someone was like " You can't be a feminist, if you use make up so often".
And, best is that when someone says main toh sirf marriages main hi lagati hoon make up.", much to my surprise - marriages! like really! I am not a grammar nerd, but, I think that saying just wedding would have suffice. Ha!

So, today, here I am like,

...2-3 minutes it takes to apply make up and I never found the skill of time management difficult, especially in the morning.

...try good herbals goods, (well, market is flooded with those now), why will you suffer with a damaged skin. In fact if you will worry what others do, you will definitely have one.

...To Papa, and few more, :) I appreciate the compliment, no one can ever find me more beautiful than you do, but I don't put on the make up thinking that I am hideous.

...And, you see the irony is that most of times I get to hear this natural thing by someone who likes the idea of getting under the knife for cosmetic surgeries. And, who knows if they ever went through one.

... I don't like to be framed as a feminist, but Google suggests that being feminist doesn't stop you from doing things which you like, definitely not wait for someone else wedding.

So, dear therapist, It is a choice. Putting on makeup. Same as the choice to decide what to wear and what to eat. Stop objectification of a woman. We don't put on make up to be a eye candy.

Thanks again,
A make up aficionado.



The post credit :

...Never to go astray
Leaving behind the path as black as coal
Memorized has that path, my black eyeliner
It is its favourite path to trail.

                                                ~ Anonymous

Friday, February 17, 2017

Toh ek cup chai ho jaye?

Tap tap. "Tea?" 
Asks rain each time.  And, an old school, preferring tea over any other beverage, I welcome this benign invitation, with open arms, that very each time.

Not just rains, every morning when dawn breaks, a cup of tea beckons me while the world sleeps. An early riser, my mornings begin with preparation of a kind of tea. The kind, which has a carefully crafted scientifically deducted recipe in which I take pride the way these Pepsis manufacturers do. Tea, carries for me reminiscences of my  childhood days, when getting up in the morning as a child, the first thing I would see was my Mummy having her tea. Over the past years, now when I am Mummy to a four year old, my morning routine has changed to a large extent. Amongst other changes is that I've also joined in my mother's morning routine, albeit, sitting at a different postal address. My mornings thinks, and so does my mother, that it is very respectable to do nothing at that first cup of tea. 

And, so therefore love of the tea, travelled with me even after when I left school to pursue further studies.  It remained a daily need in my hostel days, much to my friends' ridicule. In the early mornings of North Campus at Delhi University it was one of the things that felt like home, away from home.

Years passed, and even now when I have an extended family, sitting for chai is a daily ritual that gives the family some much needed time together. 

However, if you have experienced it too, a cup of tea can best be enjoyed all by yourself too. Honestly, for me it has been one of those few best company when I just want to clear my head. And the amount of times it has sat with me through my exams I've pulled, makes it my saviour. 

So, everyday I see love around me over a cup of tea. I see it in the evening over a cup of tea with my in- laws. I see it in my husband who makes an effort to ask me how my weekdays went, over a cup of tea on weekends. I see and feel the love for myself, while sipping it alone. 

Any tea lover would know exactly what I'm talking about. 

Toh ek cup chai ho jaye, and as you relish a sip, just think over, "Why a biscuit when dipped in water forms bubbles ?"
Real thinking happens on a cup of tea, at times. I told you.


Picture credit : Google

Sunday, January 15, 2017

Hoi polloi treading the alleys of Meerut

She is many things – a nurturer, a confidant, an amateur writer, a career woman. But at the moment that she watches her father sitting near her, she is just a daughter !

Rusted, cracked, gone parched over the years 
The wall still stood strong.
Withered, stooped, dried over the years 
The tree still rooted strong.
Dusty, monotonous, breathless gone over the years 
The clock still run strong.
Wrinkled, freckled, turned salt and pepper over the years
The mane still shine strong. 

The city which a daughter calls her hometown
There lives a man who possesses no brawn. 
A man who amongst the hoi polloi treading the old lanes of town 
embodies the tress, the tree, the clock and the bound.
For the face that still stood strong and is one in a million! 
The man whom his daughter calls Papa.

The daughter who wallows in neither prejudices nor chauvinism 
But with a demeanour festooned with steely aspires and confidence to the brim
Attempts each day to tread the footprints left by him. 
Hopes alive, that one day , she too will be remembered for a heart
that cannot be  easily forgetten amongst the hoi polloi treading the old lanes of Meerut.  

Smile adorns her eyes in the morning sun
Seeing him ruminating,
He, a few golden rays relishing.
She turns around once again, and ponders,

The ageing wisdom, it takes years and not a day,
You will have to wait, she says.